Friends and appreciation

Two stories about appreciation:

Last Sunday I went up to the lab for a bit. My lab is part of a hospital complex that is high up on a hill, so I bike to the bottom of the hill and take an aerial tram up.

Usually when I make this trip, I’m surrounded by other employees that are busy chatting with each other, checking their email, and generally being unresponsive. Since it was Sunday, the tram was instead filled with tourist types and other out of towners. They were all clamoring over the view, blown away by the birds eye view of Portland.

Now, I’m sure there are at least a couple people on my daily tram commute that gaze out on an early morning Portland and really take it in. But still, the Sunday crew’s enthusiasm just reminded of how easy it is to become dull to our surroundings, and take amazing things for granted.

A church I went to a couple years ago told this story about a teenage baseball star and his father. The star grew up idolizing his father’s professional baseball playing days and had worked hard to follow in his footsteps. He recently received a scholarship to play at a division I college and was a local hero. At one of his last home games, his father was interviewed by the local TV station and asked, “You must be so proud of your son, right?” To this he replied, “Yes, of course! He’s worked real hard, and has made me proud.” “Have you told your son that?” “Nah, I wouldn’t want it to go to his head.”

Of course, maybe the father really had his son’s best interest in mind, but since this is a story, I’m going to interpret it how I want. I think the father avoided telling his son this because he was too proud to open himself up and let his son know how proud he was.

It’s so easy to forget about the people around you. The friends that I appreciate the most, the one's I saw most frequently, were the one's I would forget about the most.

At the same time, it’s hard these days, in fact it’s probably always been hard, for two non-romantic friends to talk about how much they appreciate each other. I can understand, the times I’ve done this it’s felt really hard to put that first foot forward, and still kind of awkward after I got that first foot in there. But also, every time I have put in that effort, it’s felt really great to just acknowledge our friendship.

from ken

Are you trying to change your life? I'd love to hear about it! ken.e.noguchi@gmail.com

photo by Per Ola Wiberg ~ Powi