Dan Riggins is my friend from Kenyon College. He was my most important collaborator in my undergrad E. coli lab, one of my training partners during my last cross country season, and of course, a key drinking buddy. Here are some of his thoughts on planning and adventuring...
Running up Wayne Hill in Traverse City, MI is perhaps the most pure and regular form of personal sadism I have accomplished in my life. This particular hill exists solely just to fuck with runners' minds. Well that and it has one of the best views in town, but I'll get to that. According to google maps, it's only about 0.64 miles from bottom to top, but this is one of those hills where you truly feel like you might accidentally fall backwards and never stop falling, like from the side of cliff. This fucker is steep. And once you get to the top, you're one and only option is to complete a loop that takes you right back down to where you started from. That is to say, in running this hill, you ultimately accomplish nothing.
And yet my last year of summer training for high school cross-country, my teammate Geoff and I made it a point to run this thing at least two or three times a week. I'm not sure why, I don't remember if we ever talked about it. We would just do it at the beginning of most of our distance days. It was less than a mile from where we met each morning so we'd huff and puff up to the top, take a breather and enjoy the view, plan where we'd go next, then head out on our way. I really should stress that the view from on top is spectacular. We could see almost anywhere that we could possibly go for the rest of our run.
In any case, one morning, a training companion of ours decided to shake things up a little. After we had rested for a bit, he suddenly hopped that barrier thing that keeps cars from running off the road, and ran straight down this ravine into undergrowth that encircled the neighborhood. Laughing, but a little dumbfounded, we chased him down, down, and down, at ridiculous speeds into the forest. After the euphoria of running fast had subsided, we realized we had no real idea of where we were or where the nearest road was. Unfortunately, we decided that the only thing stupider than blindly running on into the woods was climbing back up the side of the hill. We crashed around for maybe ten to fifteen minutes and finally ended up somewhere on M-72 which we followed back into Traverse City.
It ended up being a great time. Someone could have twisted an ankle, we could have gotten lost, an angry resident could have called our Athletic Director regarding trespassing. All of these scenarios had happened before, but in this instance everything just worked out. We laughed about our adventure for the rest of the week. For example, in the midst of our exploring we came upon a random Christmas tree farm we never knew existed. I dunno, maybe you just had to be there.
But my point here is that sometimes, every once in a while, taking a risk and doing something spontaneous has its rewards. I don't want to discount the importance of working hard and planning things out. But sometimes you got to lighten up and try something new. Geoff and I loved to consider where we would run for our routes. We agonized over what way we should go and when, yet despite all this, we were decidedly bored with all of our routes within two or three weeks of training. That impromptu adventure was just what we needed.I have another example. I think Ken and my high school coach Dan Zemper would get along great. Like Ken, Zemp is a thoughtful, caring, and passionate guy. He's also the King of Shooting Shit (as Ken might put it). In any case, he retired last spring so he could devote more time to his athletic therapy home business. I got a chance to see him this winter at a Alumni reunion gathering, and while I could see that he was still the same guy I know and love there was this profound loneliness in his eyes that I had never noticed before. It's probably only partially due to retirement; he's dealt with some pretty harsh circumstances for the past few years, but whatever the cause, it made me sad.
This morning I got an email from him saying he's going to Ethiopia. Apparently at the very last minute he decided to travel as an athletic therapist with this group of runners who are trekking across the country in support of an effort to build three new schools for children there. These runners will complete 400 kilometers over the course of twelve days. Doubtless, they will be in sore need of the the kind of therapeutic services Zemper can provide. Sure he could catch some weird African disease or run into trouble with the locals. I can only imagine the financial sacrifice he will be making while away from his business. But the bottom line is that by making a spontaneous choice, my coach has the chance to feel young again, to have an adventure, and to make a tangible positive difference for some African children. He might even stave off his loneliness.I personally have always been a planner. If you ask for my outlook on life, you'll find that my opinion of experiences in the past and present is almost always a little disappointed or even embarrassed. Yet my feelings about the future are usually optimistic. For some reason, I think that if I can just lay out everything in just the right arrangement, I'll finally attain the elusive happiness I crave.
Perhaps I'm wrong though. (I often am). There are so many things to constantly consider. I want to go to med school, I want to be a successful doctor, I want to have freedom to pursue creative hobbies, I want to stay close with my girlfriend after graduation, I want to live the Pacific Northwest, I want, I want, I want. Pretty soon all these considerations become bonefied worries.
Maybe rather than planning my life, it's time to start living it.It takes a lot of psyching up for me to abandon my figurative agenda in the sky, but maybe with just the right amount of informed instincts, it's worth it to occasionally make things up on the fly.
What do you think?
Feel free to comment here or shoot me a message at rigginsda@gmail.com.
photo by Kim Cronin
“I’d love to go back to when we played as kids but things changed, and that’s the way it is.”
- Social activist Tupac Shakur
This past weekend my friend Amulya came up from Houston, TX to visit me, and see my new life in Portland. It was probably the best weekend of my life.
It was easy to plan because we more or less like the same things, so we basically did everything I’ve done in Portland that I thought was cool. This included biking everywhere in the rain, sitting on our laptops and chatting at coffee shops, perusing Powell’s bookstore while drunk, enjoying local beers at brew pubs, and of course, cute breakfast places.
At the end of the exhausting visit, we were sitting at the airport waiting for his delayed flight and drinking more tea. We were already reminiscing about the trip, and talking about deep things like soulmates and personal bests. Then, out of the corner of my eye, I caught a glimpse of a young couple walking around with a kid.
That quick glimpse was Amulya and I’s future. Like much of modern society, we would probably get married, have kids, and not have the luxury to just drop everything one weekend and do nothing but drink coffee, talk shit, and burn through a ton of cash.
Amulya reminded me of a couple wise things:
When we were kids, we loved playing Madden 04 at my house. If he had told me that when we went off to college we wouldn’t be able to do this anymore, I would have been sad, and feared the change. However, when we actually got to college it was a ton of fun visiting each other and catching up on each other’s lives.
In the future, if we only see each other once every blue moon, and we sit around drinking tea while our kids play with oversized blocks, that’d be fun.
If we live in the same city, and get coffee every Sunday morning and talk shit, that’d be fun too.
If we work in the same place and argue over budget cuts at office meetings, well, that’d be fun too.
Any number of options would really work, but of course, the question is: are any of the options ideal?
It’s hard to say, but I guess I’m starting to internalize the idea that different isn’t better or worse, it’s just, different. They are all great, they just take different kinds of appreciation. I feel like I’d much rather accept whatever situation I get put into as the best, and get as much as I can from it rather than pine for some vague made up notion of “ideal.”
It’s pretty hard, if not impossible, to compare how “good” an experience is. This past weekend was definitely a ton of fun, and I plan on referring to it as “the best weekend ever.” But can I really say it was more fun than the time he visited me at Kenyon? Or more fun than the time I surprise visited him at his favorite coffee shop at his college?
Maybe life is more along the lines of an Eastern way of thought, accepting each day as a god, taking everything it has to offer, and also just appreciating the meaning of everything.
All that said, I am really hoping to have a roommate next June.
from ken
Are you thinking about something? Write about it and post it here! Email me! ken.e.noguchi@gmail.com
So I recently updated my about page.
The "about this blog" section is still vague because, to be honest, I really don't know what this blog is about. Primarily, it's just a vehicle for me to practice my writing. I really see writing as an important part of my life in the coming days. If people want to read it, I'm thrilled to hear comments, but if not, I'm just happy to have the opportunity to write. I'm not sure why, but it feels like the right place to be.
The "about me" section is a little more solidified. I read a cool book called What Happy People Know by Dan Baker, a happiness psychologist. He outlines what qualities he sees in happy people, and one of his important ones is that happy people know where they are in life and where they want to be headed, if only vaguely. Basically, he suggests knowing your "life story" in a three sentence version or so. I've seen various permutations of this idea - a six word life summary, a word to summarize your life, etc. So anyways, that's what I tried to do the about me section, copied/pasted:
My name is Ken Noguchi. There are two things you should know about me:
1- I want to change the world.
2- I don't have a middle name, but I always wished it started with E, so my initials could be KEN.
I just graduated from Kenyon College, a rural school in Ohio, and moved out to Portland, Oregon to work as a lab manager at Oregon Health & Science University. Our lab studies the signaling mechanisms behind iron homeostasis. My dream is to manage a holistic health organization that takes a radical interdisciplinary approach to empower people to take care of other people.
I try to spend as much time as possible: being with people so I can learn to hate people less, reading and writing so I can learn to better communicate truth, and hanging out at coffee shops so I can be trendy.
If you are reading this blog for the first time, please start with the first post, "In the beginning..."
from ken
Are you trying to change your life? I'd love to hear about it! ken.e.noguchi@gmail.com
Probably the question I get asked most frequently these days is, “So, are you a student?” Only briefly resenting the fact that I look like I’m 16 and should probably still be in college, I quickly gather myself, repeat “serenity now, serenity now, serenity now…,” and reply calmly, “Yeah actually I’m working up at OHSU (Oregon Health and Science University) in a research lab. We study how your body manages iron.” Further than that, I never really know what to say. Maybe this story will paint a better picture...
It’s too uninteresting to explain in detail, but my job in a nutshell consists of growing up some liver cells, treating with certain conditions like high or low iron, then harvesting them to measure their response to such conditions. The final step involves developing a piece of film that reveals my results for a usual week-long experiment.
So about a month ago, I was going through a cold streak in lab. Cells I was trying to grow would die for no obvious reason. Simple experiments I handled without thinking twice as an undergrad turned into massive uphill battles. I kept getting flustered, which made me more nervous, and I messed up over and over. My confidence looked something like Ted from the cult classic sitcom, Scrubs. In other words, it was shot.
One of those depressing days, with the grace of God I had painstakingly reached the final step of developing a piece of film with my data on it. I waited in the darkroom with the red light on, allowing the chemiluminscent marker to burn its mark into the Kodak blue x-ray film. Reluctant but feeling confident, I stuck my piece of film into the developer. Waiting for the moment of truth. Was this the day my cold streak would finally break? Would I be a genius again? Or would my last six days be useless, again?
As I waited, the developer started making ungodly screeching sounds. My piece of film was stuck in the goddamn developer. I momentarily considered hiring a therapist.
I quickly collected myself. Realizing I had no idea what to do, I went over to one of our grad students and asked her to save me. We went and got one of the professors, Jack, who was experienced at fixing outdated lab machinery. He was the kind of guy who has a huge smile on his face and asks questions like, “So I’m sure you did everything absolutely right, but were you sure to make the obvious decision to put the film in vertically?”
Together, we struggled with it for a while, trying all the obvious solutions, replacing the rollers, tightening the screws, nothing worked. With time, we were able to put together a patchwork solution.
He stepped out, and I was left in the dark again, to test the developer. Somehow, it felt symbolic to be standing in the dark. Having no idea what was going on. Being lost.
Realizing I was taking myself too seriously, and that I was just developing some film, I stuck the film in the developer and stood there, quietly but audibly humming Maroon 5 to myself.
The film came out. The results didn’t look great, but the developer worked. I stepped out of the dark room and saw Jack, who looked engaged with one of his students. I waited a second to make eye contact with him, and threw up an awkward thumbs up along with a forced-looking smile, signaling success. He raised a fist and exclaimed, “We persevere,” and went right back to work...
Sometimes, what’s on that piece of blue film isn’t what you want. But maybe that’s not what counts. Maybe there will always be mountains beyond mountains. Maybe it’s about accepting those mountains as an inevitable part of a beautiful life. Maybe, it’s just about persevering.
Maybe, even when there’s no hoop, you just have to keep throwing that basketball up because you never know what can happen when you keep fighting.
from ken
Are you trying to change your life? I'd love to hear about it! ken.e.noguchi@gmail.com
I was recently talking about the difference between happiness and satisfaction. In the movie “500 Days of Summer” the main character freaks out about how the girl he’s been seeing can’t commit to him, and the girl replies that she can’t promise that she’ll wake up every morning and feel the same way for him. That’s how I see happiness, as a moment-to-moment mood thing. Sometimes it has highs, but other times it fades away for no real reason, and it probably has mostly to do with rapidly turning over brain chemicals. On the other hand, being able to take a step out of your environment, and looking at your life apart from the hectic mess is a good way to assess satisfaction. Life is going to be busy, sometimes crazy, and other times a hassle. But if you can say despite the pain, you still love your life, that’s something like real satisfaction. To me, satisfaction is the more important of the two, especially since you have so much more control over it. Essentially, I think about it as putting yourself on a road you like and taking the detours and potholes as they come. But there are definitely days when I randomly feel down for no real reason. Well, maybe there is a reason for it, but I think it’s probably just something superficial like not getting enough sleep, having worked out too hard, caffeine crash, etc. So even though I think satisfaction is more important, dealing with your day to day happiness is important too. I used to not be a fan of these bandaid type solutions, but sometimes you just need short-term solutions to survive and help gap you to the long-term solutions. And knowing that it’s just a superficial thing makes it a lot easier to deal with, because you can fight back with superficial solutions. Here are some that actually improve my mood: 1- Force myself to go to sleep early.2- Get moving and go for a light workout. 3- Change something in my environment, like adding flowers to my apartment or slightly moving the angle of my couch.4- Shower. It’s nice to have little tricks like these to help take care of myself, and keep myself sane enough to focus on developing satisfaction with my life. from kenAre you trying to change your life? I'd love to hear about it! ken.e.noguchi@gmail.com
The last few weeks, I feel like I’ve been crazy busy. Fortunately, all with awesome things, but busy nonetheless. When I was feeling like I was pushing on burnout, I started worrying, and fortunately again, three ideas popped into my life.The first was this inspiring poem written by one of my friends:Sweat burns my eyes
It is hot and I am tired
For days now (or has it been years?)
I have been climbing
And climbing
And climbing
There is no end in sight
Yet I must go on
I must keep climbing
For if I stop
I might become rooted
I loved this poem for several reasons. The simplicity, for one, and also the idea that sometimes you just have to lose track of time and not worry about how long you’ve been climbing. I definitely have a tendency to think, oh I haven’t taken a break in x days, I must need a break!But what I loved most about the poem was the last word, “rooted.” I love the shortness of poetry, it allows every word to hold SO much meaning, and that one word, rooted, just really connected with me. I always want to be making progress, improving myself, and avoid getting stale or rooted. One of my biggest fears is that feeling of being stuck. Time is precious!The second was a Filipino phrase my friend told me about, “isang bagsak” which translates to something like “one down.” A quick google search showed that it has multiple vaguely similar interpretations, but I think the basic idea is to exclaim this phrase, along with a clap, at the end of a group meeting to establish a sense of solidarity and progress. On my run this morning, my running partner was mentioning that he’s starting to get in shape, and we talked about how awesome it is to feel your fitness improving. It’s always an incredible feeling to be making progress, whether in physical fitness or as a group fighting for a beautiful cause, no matter how seemingly small the progress may be. And this reminded me, I am making progress! I’m getting better at working with my cells, making good friends, having amazing volunteer jobs, and just generally spending my days doing things I want to be doing. And of course, good things always come in three's, so I was expecting a third inspirational sign, and it turned out to be a Buddhist saying. “Act always as if the future of the universe depended on what you did, while laughing at yourself for thinking that whatever you do makes any difference.”
So the first two things, my friend’s poem and “isang bagsak,” helped me realize that I don’t want to get rooted and that I am making real progress, even if it seems more penguin-paced than hummingbird-paced. The third, the Buddhist saying, just made me remember to laugh at myself for taking myself so seriously and getting so stressed out, and enjoy the fact that I’m actually making progress in the direction I want to go in. from kenAre you trying to change your life? I'd love to hear about it! ken.e.noguchi@gmail.com
photo by Tambako the Jaguar
I recently read a timely New York Times column about how technology deprives our brains of well-deserved rest. The article explained that people are obsessing over new technology, taking multi-tasking to a whole new level by reading an e-book while watching the news and ellipticalling. It sure sounds efficient, but the article argues that without some down time, our brain doesn’t have the time to consolidate the information and learn from it, so our brain just gets overwhelmed. It seems like it makes sense. From a physiological standpoint, new synapses take time to grow and if our neurons are overstimulated, they won’t have time to grow. I think it makes even more sense from an anecdotal standpoint, whenever I multi-task and try to listen to a book-on-tape while I workout I never really remember it.So to avoid being overly busy, I’m trying to simplify my life and disconnect from technology a little bit. I'm hoping this will help me to focus on whatever environment I happen to be in, and whatever I am doing now. I decided not to buy a TV or get internet at my apartment, because I figured those would be easy distractions to cut out. I try to avoid having my phone on my person to evade the easy habit of flipping open my phone every few minutes to check for new text messages. Of course, if you have a reason to always be connected, or just want to be, that can totally work too. But for me, I wanted to make myself more able to connect with my current environment. This isn’t without flaws, of course, as I often miss phone calls and occasionally I will have to go out of my way to send a quick email, but it’s what I chose.I still go to the coffee shop to use their internet, and I still always keep my phone in my backpack, which is almost always around me. But without that easy convenience of just reaching into my pocket to have texting power at my fingertips, or being able to quickly flip open my laptop to see that I, for the fifth time this hour, have no new emails, it makes it easier for me to focus on other things I want to spend my time on, like reading, talking to the people around me, or just taking some quiet time for myself.from kenAre you trying to change your life? I'd love to hear about it! ken.e.noguchi@gmail.com
photo by Esther Gibbons
When you look around, at you friends, your co-workers, your family, your neighbours, how do you size up? Not in the sense of, how much do you make, who lives in a nicer neighbourhood, or who can run faster, but does anyone’s life make you think, I wish I was living their life? I turn to the radical Malcolm X for his sharp insight:“Anytime you find someone more successful than you are, especially when you’re both engaged in the same business – you know they’re doing something you’re not.”I try to apply this thought to the “business” of life. If there’s any life out there that really makes you think, man their life is so much better than mine, then they’re probably doing something you’re not. When I realize that someone else’s life is better than mine, it’s easy for me to victimize myself, I tell myself they’re just better than I am: those guys have a sweet job because they’re smarter than me, that girl’s too cool for me, that guy was born to write. The good news is, there’s an easy solution. Whatever you like in their life, you can just go out and get it. Of course, it’s easier said than done, a lot of patience is needed, and you’ll need to find the right people to help you. But still, the bottom line is the same, if you want a better life you can go out and get it. I had a track coach in college who always preached never putting any other runner up on a pedestal. He was adamant that you could beat anyone you wanted if you were willing to fight, but the moment you convinced yourself that someone else was out of your league, it was game over. I think there’s something wise to that. The news anchor Keith Olbermann had a similar thought:“The world bursts at the seams with people ready to tell you, you’re not enough. On occasion, some may be correct. But do not do their work for them. Seek any job, ask anyone out, pursue any goal. Don’t take it personally when they say no – they may not be smart enough to say yes.”When we put other people on a pedestal I think we sell ourselves short. As long as you are bring true to yourself, you are great as who you are!I think ultimately, one of the ideals of life is to be living in such a way that you wouldn’t want to be living anybody else’s life. That’s part being satisfied with yourself, but also part going out and getting what you want. from kenAre you trying to change your life? I'd love to hear about it! ken.e.noguchi@gmail.com
photo by kevindooley
I love the start of the day because it reflects hope for your day. A quote from the movie Hitch: “Start every day, as if it were on purpose.”
A great movie and a great quote. When I struggle out of bed in the morning, blindsided by my alarm, I stagger for a few moments. Then, I try my best to remember why I’m waking up instead of going back to sleep and doing nothing. My morning routine is so habitualized that I don’t really have to think through it, instead I work on reminding myself of my goals: being friendly and open with people, staying patient when things don’t go my way, be willing to take risks. I usually continue this process through my bike ride commute through an eerily peaceful downtown. The serene feel of the city and the morning in general really helps put me in the right mindset to take on the day. I also love the end of the day, but because it provides a little bit of time to reflect. At these times, I often turn to a pair of quotes by St. Francis de Sales and Mary Anne Radmacher: “Have patience with all thing, but chiefly have patience with yourself. Don’t lose courage in considering your own imperfections.”
“Courage does not always roar, sometimes, courage is the quiet voice at the end of the night whispering, I will try again tomorrow.”
It’s easy to only see the failures when you recollect on the day: I wish I hadn’t said that, I can’t believe I fell off my bike in front of all those people, I hate that I messed up again! But I think a lot of life is about courage. To accept those failures and to keep on failing. Maybe hoping that one day you’ll get the breaks, but also being ok if you don’t. At the end of the day, if you can honestly look yourself in the mirror, look at all the high points and low points of you day, and tell yourself that you wouldn’t want to be living any other life, well, that’s a pretty good end to a day! from ken Are you trying to change your life? I'd love to hear about it! ken.e.noguchi@gmail.com
photo by Vince Alongi
“None of us will ever accomplish anything excellent or commanding except when he listens to this whisper which is heard by him alone.” - Ralph Waldo Emerson
I think that whisper Emerson is referring to is inspiration, and what inspiration can do is refocus us. Inspiration can come from anywhere, as long as we are willing to pay attention to it. Recently, I’ve been trying to make more of a conscious effort to slow down, which has really helped me to refocus on what I’m trying to do with my life. My commute is a great example of how I make my life too busy and block out that gentle whisper of inspiration. In the past I spent my commute trying to make every minute “productive,” listening to various podcasts or skimming through books I would never remember, but lately I’ve been trying to just sit tight and take in my surroundings. So, the other day on my commute I was zoning out and blankly looking out on the city and all the huge apartment complexes. Those big apartment complexes have always fascinated me for some reason. I think it’s because it reminds me of how big the world is, seeing all those dimly lit windows with people I’ll never meet. The strangest part is that every person in every one of those windows has an incredible story and is fighting a great battle. It really reminded me of the importance of every single person.Yesterday I saw an old friend from high school that I hadn’t seen in probably five years or so. We’re both pretty easy going, so we re-connected quickly and smoothly, as we reminisced on old times and shared our lives for the past few years. It felt great to remember the past and how lucky I was to grow up with such great friends. It also made me excited for all there is to still discover in the world, and to realize I still had so many more great friends to make. All those unknown rooms in those huge apartments, filled with perspectives I would have never even imagined and conversations yet to happen. All that from a morning commute!from kenAre you trying to change your life? I'd love to hear about it! ken.e.noguchi@gmail.com
photo by williamcho
Have you ever felt like everything in your life was going right? Felt like years of hard work have finally paid off?Does everything you touch turn to gold?Some people may say that such a picturesque time is a fallacy and that you shouldn’t live for the successes and those perfect days. I heard some wise words that said, “Success is nothing, it is an accident.” I am definitely a recent convert to this sort of wisdom that puts the focus on the journey rather than the end destination. That was one of the important realizations that made me want to change my life and actually do more things I loved doing, not just loved the idea of doing. So you shouldn’t just live for the peak of the mountain, so to say, but it seems like every once in a long while, all the stars can align. And when they do, there’s really no reason not to sit back, appreciate all you’ve done, and enjoy the ride. Of course, it sounds obvious to enjoy the good times, but I know I have a tendency to push any victories off to the side, and immediately try to refocus myself on the journey. But sometimes it's good to celebrate.The best way I can describe this feeling is that I can see so many of the goals I set for myself coming together and crystallizing in front of my eyes. Really quick, two of these goals were: Get involved in a community: I feel like I’m really starting to love my church family and I’m starting to meet more and more people.Figure out what I want to do with my life: I love my time volunteering at the pediatrics clinic. In fact, it pains me to leave.Anyways, my friend and I referred to these times as “hot streaks,” and it reminds me of the importance of having purpose in life. Whenever you can see that your daily actions align with some sort of greater purpose you’ve set for your life, it really feels like your life is rolling, and just like that you’re on a hot streak.from kenAre you trying to change your life? I'd love to hear about it! ken.e.noguchi@gmail.com
photo by Beverly and Pack
Meeting and Passing
By Robert Frost
As I went down the hill along the wall
There was a gate I had leaned at for the view
And had just turned from when I first saw you
As you came up the hill. We met.
But all We did that day was mingle great and small
Footprints in summer dust as if we drew
The figure of our being less than two
But more than one as yet. Your parasol
Pointed the decimal off with one deep thrust.
And all the time we talked you seemed to see
Something down there to smile at in the dust.
(Oh, it was without prejudice to me!)
Afterward I went past what you had passed
Before we met and you what I had passed.
I was just thinking about some old friends that I haven’t talked to in a while, and this poem came to my head. I memorized it when I spent a summer waiting tables at a ranch in Wyoming. At the time it was especially meaningful, knowing that the friends I was making were playing a huge role in my life at the time but I would probably never see them again after that summer. It’s definitely sad to completely lose touch with friends that seemed so close and important at the time, but it cheers me up to look back on our memories. I still remember the epic spontaneous hikes, almost dying while climbing Middle Teton, stealing brownies from the restaurant, working grueling 16 hour days, all the fun times that I will hopefully never forget about. I think, all that to say, relationships are fleeting. Not even the strongest of relationships can provide a guarantee that they will always be there. People grow apart, sometimes out of choice, but moreoften just because of circumstances that are out of our control. The most obvious one being, people changing location. That’s probably what makes moving so hard. I know that’s why it was hard for me. But I don’t think that just because relationships have an end, it means whatever relationships you have now are meaningless. In fact, it’s more the reason to cherish what you have now and appreciate the moment. It’s also a good reminder for me to try to catch up with some old friends.from kenAre you trying to change your life? I'd love to hear about it! ken.e.noguchi@gmail.com
photo by pardeshi
There is something fundamental about sports like running, cycling, swimming, rowing, that make them different from sports like basketball or soccer. It’s hard to say what that is exactly, but I think it has to do with the fact that it really tests how hard you can, or want, to push yourself. As a result, those sports really teach you a lot.The legendary University of Oregon running coach Bill Bowerman once told his athletes:“Running, one might say, is an absurd pastime upon which to be exhausting ourselves. But if you can find meaning in the kind of running required of you to stay on this team, perhaps you’ll find meaning in another absurd pastime: life.”
I have been running for the past eight years, which makes it the single activity in my life that I have been doing for the longest time. Through those eight years I have learned countless important lessons, one of the more important ones is brought up in John L. Parker’s epic novel Once A Runner. The protagonist, Quenton Cassidy, is a collegiate track athlete training for the Olympics. Being the stud athlete he is, everybody asks him questions about what he eats, whether he believes in stretching, what his resting heart rate was, how many hours of sleep he got, and so on. Cassidy’s answer to all this mess is simple:“The secret is this: there is no secret.”
He goes on to explain it is about simple hard work, and running countless miles. That’s the great thing about running. Surely, good genes can help, but being good at long distance running is largely about running those painful extra miles. I think the lesson here is an important one. When thinking about change and improving one’s life, the tendency is to look at the quick fixes and tricks that other people apply, here are some of the most common ones I’ve come across:Tired of your environment? Move!Sick of your job? Get new one!Tired of your exercise routine? Try yoga!Bored of your hobbies? Learn a musical instrument!Confused about your life? Write about it!I have taken up all these trick changes, hoping for a quick fix, which some of them have definitely provided. But at the same time, these quick fixes only last for so long. The hard truth is, there is no secret trick to improving your life. It just comes down to picking one or a few things you like and keep doing them, whether it’s running everyday, making an effort to be social, or working in your garden every weekend. This past week was pretty hectic, at the end of it I felt like giving up and scrapping a lot of my life projects - quitting my volunteer work, giving up training for the Portland Marathon, and so on. I’m not sure what exactly reminded me, but something brought me back and gave me the fuel to keep pushing through all the crap. I think, sometimes, you just have to love that feeling of being helpless and being completely overwhelmed. There are undoubtedly going to be times when you are that overwhelmed, and that’s certainly part of the deal of life, so you might as well love it. Or something like that?from kenAre you trying to change your life? I'd love to hear about it! ken.e.noguchi@gmail.comphoto by MartynvanDeelen
David Brooks had this insightful column in the New York Times today about a commencement speech given by an economist at Harvard Business School. The speech was about living a meaningful life by finding your life goal and allocating your time and energy around that goal. Specifically, the speech emphasized creating personal time for yourself outside of your career or your studies to pursue family time or friend time or hobby time, and help yourself figure out that vision.Brooks went on to add to the speech, articulating a second way of life focused on the moment. It was interesting for me to see these two ideas come head to head, as they are somewhat, but not completely, opposing ideas. He argues that young people can’t understand the meaning of abstract concepts like parenthood or old age until they are engaged in them, and it’s useless to try to plan so far ahead. He claims the big question these types of people ask is, “What are my circumstances asking me to do?” This question creates a lifestyle that is much more concrete and short-term, driven by situational awareness and rapid adaptation. I imagine the ideal life to be some combination of these two schools of life, thriving in the environment you happen to be in now, while keeping an eye out for new environments you want to try out. The current surroundings perspective makes my immediate decision-making more relevant, which is great because it makes every moment more real. Whenever I have some downtime, I can figure out something to do to impact my environment. I don’t need to wait around to make my surroundings a better place! On the other hand, the future goals perspective emphasizes the importance of change. It keeps me constantly tinkering with my life to figure out what new surroundings I want to put myself into. from kenAre you trying to change your life? I'd love to hear about it! ken.e.noguchi@gmail.com
photo by ZeroOne
I used to think that goals were everything, and that everything you do should be oriented around how to achieve certain goals in your life. I read a book called Flow by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi that talked about being hyper-focused on the moment and the necessity of purpose in attaining that level of focus. Recently, I’ve started to step away from a totally goal-oriented state of mind, but I’ve still retained the habit of setting goals and trying to figure out how to achieve them. Then, I read an insightful post on Zen Habits about the importance of having no goals. The main idea was that people shouldn't be limited by their goals and to discover unexpected things by following your passions and picking up on sidenotes. I think one danger of this mentality of doing whatever pleases you at the time is that it can also be limiting, in a sense. For example, one of the hobbies I’m trying to pick up right now is to learn to play the harmonica. I really don’t know how to play it very well and I’m trying to learn a lot of the basics. A lot of times, I don’t really want to go through the drudgery or learning the basics, but if I never put in the time to learn them, I’ll never really learn how to play the harmonica to its fullest. Now you might think that the harmonica might not be one of my passions. Which could be true, so I’ll use another example. One of my favorite hobbies is running. I’ve been running for about 8 years now, so I can safely say it is something I enjoy. One of the hardest parts of running is coming back after an injury or some time off and working your way back into shape. It feels terrible trying to get back in shape. You run a fraction of what you used to and end up feeling completely destroyed. However, I know that in order to get to a point where I can just go out for a run and enjoy it, I need to work through the tough time of getting back in shape. So is it wrong to have the goal of getting back into shape so I can enjoy running? Like most things, it’s confusing. I think part of following your passions and taking sidenotes is dabbling in things you might not like initially to see if they’ll grow on you.I do think some goals are appropriate, including ones that are long-term like I want to get ____ job or I want to run ____ marathon. It feels great to be working towards some distant, possibly unachievable, goal. It's also a helpful trick to motivate yourself to do something that you know you'll enjoy, but isn't always on the top of your to do list. Of course, it’s also easy to hate your life because the goal you chose isn’t for you. You just have to establish a good system of picking the goals, and be willing to abandon the goals if they aren’t working for you. Like all things, I guess you just have to pick the right shade of grey.from kenAre you trying to change your life? I'd love to hear about it! ken.e.noguchi@gmail.com
Dan Riggins is my friend from Kenyon College. He was my most important collaborator in my undergrad E. coli lab, one of my training partners during my last cross country season, and of course, a key drinking buddy. Here are some of his thoughts on planning and adventuring...
